Shit And Get Off The Pot

I'm annoying the hell out of everyone.  I "share" posts all day on Facebook indicating current issues with GMO or non organic foods, or organic foods for that matter.  My friends finally told me I should blog, not because they want me to have an arena to voice my opinions, but because they want me to stop spewing my organic vitriol all over their news feeds.

Yesterdays issue was Arsenic Rice.  Today it's Anti-biotic dredged "Organic" apples and pears.  7 hours ago it was pink slime, last week it was Cadbury's Creme Eggs.  Let's not talk about the frankensalmon.

I was ecstatic last week when I found Greenpeace's True Food Guide which appeared to list a lot of processed foods and whether they contained GMO ingredients or not.  After scratching the surface by directly contacting a number of the companies on the list I was irritated to discover that a lot of the "good" products were "bad" and vice versa.  I felt particularly badly for the companies that have been listed as containing GMO's when they are adamant that they do not, have never, and will never use GMO's.  So now where am I?  I have a limited idea of what products are good and bad, and nearly had my Facebook account deactivated as a result of a number of pissed off companies reporting me as abusive for asking if their foods contained GMO's.  I've done my research, I've lived my research, I know my products, and I know how to use them.  My products are organic vegetables, cabbage, carrot and kale.  My grains are quinoa and farro, my bread is organic, my pasta is organic buckwheat soba.  I've said goodbye to soya sauce and hello to organic tamari (years ago), goodbye to canola oil, hello to organic coconut oil and organic olive oil.  Organic apple cider vinegar is my best friend.  If I don't trust the government, I don't trust the label.  I don't trust many labels.

Yesterday I had to spend over an hour walking the dogs outside my mum's doctor's office.  It's a small discreet wood framed door with a natural cotton curtain obscuring the view through the glass panel.  Dr Eng, Natural Medicine Practitioner.  It sounds good unless you realise that nothing really good goes on inside. If you are walking through Dr Eng's door you are desperate.  You are fearful.  You are stricken. Your body has been invaded by uncontrollable breeding aliens and you are now willing to try anything to slow the attack.  As I circled the park I noticed an old fashioned community notice board with little glass sliding doors that had no lock.  There was no authoritarian stamp on the postings, just regular people typed notices offering the usual inoffensive services - 17 year old Italian foreign exchange student looking for baby sitting work, Yoga classes, domestic services, yard work....  That when I decided to "shit and get off the pot." Once I'm done blogging about it I'm going over to my friend Mara's house who is a marketing weenie (sorry, Guru) and we are going to prepare Organic Food Fascists business cards, brochures, and flyers.  It's not enough for me to nag people on Facebook anymore and then just go in to line cooking jobs and prepare high paced poison plates of the day.  I'm Done.  If someone wants to eat my food, learn how to shop and cook, then I'll do it.  If you know me, then you've had me rummage through your kitchen cupboards and rant at you about the dangers of Teflon, probably 10 years ago.  I've thrown out your expired cheez whiz, I've denigrated your Kool Aid, I've ridiculed your diet soda, I've lambasted your juice like products, and I've stolen your margarine and replaced it with olive oil.  Now, I'm going to make a living doing it, charging realistic and fair prices to help people stop dying.  Without killing them.